📿 Lately, my meditation practice of many years has evolved into a deeper level.
📿 Although I believe, in reality, that the constant practice that has remained the same is the one that has changed the way I see and feel things.
📿 I used to reach this layer of the mind where I would find total darkness and I would freak out, literally just moving around and eventually standing up and ending my meditation.
📿 Now, I have learnt that to stay with that darkness is the key.
📿 I just stay, stay, stay, breathe, stay…. and sometimes become anxious, sometimes I fall asleep. Sometimes I stay long enough to see a light starting to illuminate that darkness.
📿 The thing is, ot doesn’t matter!
📿 Learning to stay, to be constant every day, to come back to meditation no matter what (if I’m lazy, tired, uninspired, sick, etc.), is the practice, it is what it’s all about!
📿 When I tell people and students that it just takes a bit of time and patience to meditate, sometimes they don’t believe me, and I don’t want them to believe my words without experimenting themselves.
📿 After around 10 years since I started playing with this thing of observing and studying myself, I have JUST understood that showing up and being there is all that counts.
📿 No matter what position I’m in, no matter where, in silence or in chaos, just being there and staying with whatever is, is what helps me connect to my truth.
📿 A curious thing about it all, is that my past has become more blurry the more I meditate.
📿 Sometimes I struggle to remember if something was real, or it was a dream, or even a thought, or a past life memory, or whatever….. Images, thoughts, feelings, imaginations, and memories have stopped being of MY past, to just becoming ‘what is not here’, against ‘what is here and now’.
📿 Those are my two categories now…
📿 Here and Now, is all that will ever exist.